Monday, August 13, 2012

Observations at Unload and Restraint

The bag on the side of the rocket is NOT for used gum.

Indoor voices please. Or, try not talking all at once.

People of Walmart - skipping the morning shower is never a good idea.

Please, take your time gathering your things before exiting the rocket. There are not 12 other rockets hurtling through space and due to arrive in 2.3 minutes.

Little kids who conquered your fears and rode a rocket for the first time - you are my favorite. You're stinkin' adorable. And YES, that was AWESOME!

Dads who make fun of the Moms for checking the lap bar 40 times on their little ones - we see you making gestures behind your kid, asking us to check the lap bar. Kudos for being discreet and not letting the kid see you do it.

Conversely, parents who force a screaming and hysterical child into a seat - no, I will not send that rocket. You can do a Rider Switch. The boy was begging and pleading with us to get him off the ride! A 2.3 minute ride is not worth your child's mental well-being.

Guests who ask, "Is this ride fast?" It's a ROLLER COASTER.

Guests who ask, "Is this ride scary?" It's a ROLLER COASTER. (Thrilling? Yes. Scary? No.)

Guests who salute me or give me Trekkie hand gestures - you are also my favorite. Carry on, Space Traveler. Carry on.


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